Q & A

The CDC has issued a very serious warning. This fall and winter, between 60 - 120 million Americans could become sick with the Swine Flu. More will contract the virus, without becoming ill. The worst case scenario, 90,000 Americans could die.

Lately, I've given the Swine Flu, vaccines, and trying to stay well, a lot of thought. It's also sparked memories about gross medicines my mother gave us as kids. She used to tell us stories of her father making, and giving them home remedies that sound like a witch potions.

The worst and the grossest (I know it's not a word, work with me okay), medicine I remember taking is Father John. That stuff had a terrible stinch! It was so thick, I couldn't swallow it. As soon as it hit the back of my tongue, it and all the contents of my stomach came up, and out! Mama would be waiting with another spoonful, until it went, and stayed down!

What are your gross medicine or home remedy horror stories?

Crossing "The Bridge"

My Dad is from Greenville, M-I- crooked letter, crooked letter -I- crooked letter, crooked letter -I-, hump back, hump back -I. As kids, we visited our grandparents frequently! In order to get there from Arkansas, we had to cross the mighty Mississippi River by way of,
"The Bridge."

I was okay about riding over the narrow, two lane bridge, with no shoulders. Somewhere around Jr. High School, I learned that it was impossible to open a car door, or let down a window under water. That prompted me to come up with a plan of escape, in the event we went over.

At 18, I drove over that bridge for the very first time. That day is etched in my brain for ever. I had to drive Grand daddy's 1969 Impala standard shift, with the gears on the column, no power steering, and tears in my eyes, over "The Bridge." It was just me and my sister. Including that day, I can count the number of times I've driven over it. Over the years, I've either been with my parents, or my husband. If I was alone with the kids, I'd stop and pick up my sister, who lives in the town right before the bridge.

Last weekend, on my way to a cousin's funeral, I had to cross it by myself. Scared as I could be, I took a few pictures to commemorate my crossing "The Bridge."

The following picture, I was ascending, (I like that word). That's when I started talking to myself, like the "Little Engine That Could."

And this is "The Bridge." I had to hurry, and take this picture. Once I got up there over the water, there was no way I was going to let go of that steering wheel to take a picture, swat a fly, or even scratch my nose!

Almost at the top, I meet three 18 wheeler's. I start chanting, "Stay on your side. Stay on your side. Stay on your side." There are no shoulders to ease over on. Can you see?
The speed limit across "The Bridge," is 45 mph. With both hands on the wheel, I drove 35 - 38 mph. Don't laugh!

Whew! Finally descending! I can breath again!

After all these years, they're building a new bridge, complete with shoulders. Niiiiice! MY dad plans on driving across it opening day. Guess who won't be joining him.

I'm A Reality Show Junkie!

Hi, I'm LaTonya, and I'm addicted to Reality TV.

With the very first season of Survivor, I was hooked! I enjoy mix of reality shows, including Top Chef, Flavor of Love, Project Runway, Making the Band, The Next Food Network Star, Runs House, Keisha Cole, I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here, Fourth & Long, Tiny & Toya, The Great American Road Trip, More to Love, and I'm sure I'm missing a few. Those too!

My three favorites right now are The Great American Road Trip, The Real Housewives of Atlanta, and The T. O. Show!

My family and I want to be on the next season of The Great American Road Trip. We think the Richardson's could kick but! In this week's finale, and the underdogs, the Di Salvatore family won. I couldn't believe it. The team least likely to win, like the tortoise, came from behind and won the whole shabang! The Coote's (Cootie's) got their booties, the family most likely to win LOST!

The first season of Real Housewives of Atlanta, got under my radar. However, the very first episode of season two had me hooked, and waiting for the next. After last week, I decided, Shree, Kim and Nene are not my favorites. They cut up so in that restaurant, I was embarrassed! But not embarrassed enough to stop watching the show. Who doesn't love someone else's drama.

I am favoring Khandi, the new girl. So far, she's more down to earth, and has a level head about herself. That doesn't mean she won't come out of the box real soon though. Like soap operas, the Real Housewives of Atlanta, have characters you love, love to hate, and adore.

Special Report! This just in: Justice Fergie posted today, about the Atlanta Housewives with a clip of Kim's new single, "Tardy for the Party." Head over there and check it out!

The T. O. Show, was a great move on the part his publicists Mo, and Kita. With him trying to change his image, or the public's perception, this show was just what he needed! What better way than show he's not just a mouth with a "Big Ego," attitude, with a chip on his shoulder the size of the universe. He's actually human, with feelings and emotions, real friends! T. O. is allowing us to walk with him, and share his intimate space. I'm seeing Terrel!

A few episodes ago, Terrel visited his grandmother. With all the talking he was doing, she just sat there, unphased by Alzheimer's. His breaking down and crying, had me wanting to hand him a tissue. I was fighting back my own tears. But when she spoke, after not having spoke in years, telling him he'd be alright. I was done for! That day, I became a fan of Terrel Owens, T. O., or whatever he wants to calls himself!

And the show with his father. OMG! I needed a box of tissues. I was looking out the corner of my eye to see if Mr. Husband was crying too.

We're on the go, and the five degrees, (my children), always has a practice, game, rehearsal or meeting. I often miss my shows at their scheduled time. Thank heavens for DVR! That is the best thing since sliced bread, and the cell phone!

Excuse me while I set it to record for tonight!

I've Got What? Where?

After having x-rays done in the ER a few weeks ago, I took the film to a follow-up with an orthopaedic specialist. Aside from what he was supposed to look at, he informed me of a little something more.

"How many children have you had?" He asked.

"Five." I'm thinking, what does that have to do with my tailbone?

"That would explain it," he said. "You have arthritis of the pelvis."

"I have what?" I asked. "Where?" My mother chimed in.

"Arthritis in your pelvis," he continued to explain, pointing at the skeleton. "Do you hurt there?"

"No!"

I was so discombobulated! (Wow, I've finally used this word in my writing.) I'm sure I had that WTH look on my face. I have that look right now, just writing about it. It is the result of having multiple births. The whole pelvic bone separating, yada, yada, yada. Whoda thunk?!

My Grand-daddy often complained about the Arthur boys riding his legs. I know of a few other places people have arthritis, but the pelvis? That's a new one!

I know a few people who talk excessively. You know, opening their mouths over, and over again. Will they one day have arthritis of the jaw? I'm just askin?

Drive by Shooting

My family and I were driving home after a Sunday evening visit Grandma. Getting off on our exit, we saw this beautiful sunset! Of course, I always carry my camera in my purse for opportunities like this.

And wouldn't you know it, the batteries were dead! I grabbed my cell phone and took this picture, while cars were lining up behind me. We live three blocks from the exit. I flew the rest of the way home and hurriedly found a set of batteries, and rushed back. Mr. Husband couldn't believe I was trying to go back to take a picture. Are you kidding me! This was awesome. The picture from my camera didn't come close.

This reminds me of the book, "Their Eyes Were Watching God," by Zora Neale Hurston. Teacake asked during a hurricane, "Janie, whatcha doing?"

"Watching God," she said.

And that's all I have to say about that!

Revive Again, and Again, and ...

Recently, I had a procedure that involved sedation. After arriving at the hospital, I had sign a stack forms, insurance, privacy act... The registration clerk asked if I had a living will.

Screeching halt... Skinny blond woman say what?

"Do. you. have. a living will?"

WTH? Do I have a living will?! It was a pain management PROCEDURE, not out patient SURGERY. Blonde lady so herself. I was being sedated, not given anesthesia.

Ashamed, but I had to admit, I do not have a living will. Mr. Husband and I discussed it at length, but haven't gotten around to doing so. "As long as someone knows your wishes," she says.

"My husband is here," I tell her. Then finally the lights coming on, and I realized what she was saying. I turned to Mr Husband, "Revive me again, and again, and again! None of that, 'she'd want to go on.' Revive me!"

I want to be resuscitated. On several occasions prior to this procedure, I've made my wishes clear, very clear. But I did reiterate it again. Dog-gonit, save me from the light!

My mother says she doesn't want to be resuscitated. "Just let me go," she says. Daddy and I are on the same page. Don't let me go so easy.

There were a few directives I needed Mr. Husband to know, JUST IN CASE. Keep my pictures out. The electricity and cable bills are due, and give my cell phone to twelve year old middle daughter. That covered it.

Summer's Coming To An End

Wednesday, is the first day of school. The closer it gets, the more I'm NOT so excited! When that bell rings, it will be official. Summer break is a wrap. Done. Finished!

When my oldest was in elementary school, my friend and I would meet for a Coke, after the First Day of School Ritual. Even after she moved away, we celebrated via telephone. Once her children finished school, I continued by adding lunch at my favorite Chinese restaurant, and watching The Color Purple.

As much as I'd love to get my celebration on, I'm just not ready. I want the lazy days of summer to continue for a little while longer. Starting August 19, we (that includes me), will start the whole "school routine." That means rolling at 5:30 a.m, fussing and threatening kids to get ready, as well as, yelling out the time, every 15 minutes. Occasionally, it includes pushing the two bus riders out the door with shoes, and breakfast in hand. It can get UGLY!

I've enjoyed waking up at 7 a.m. getting ready for work, and dropping one or two off at practice, not so early. Not being in a hurry and not fussing feels great.

All the other parents will be smiling and excited about their children being out of the house, no longer running up electricity bills, and eating up all the food. I'll be the grumpy Mom in the corner, wearing a frown, and lip dragging the ground!

The count down is on. The first break is Labor Day, 12 days after the first day of school. The second is 31 days after that!

Q & A

Outside of the regular stuff, keys, money ... I always carry a camera in my purse. I never know when I'll come across the perfect drive by shooting opportunity, (something worthy of a picture), or my kids doing something amazing. I may also need a camera to take a picture as evidence.

What's the one thing you always carry in your purse (wallet)?

My Mind Is Playing Tricks On Me!

At 41 years of age, with five children ages 20 to almost 10, the craziest thing that could happen to me now, is to get pregnant!

Last week, while laying in bed I felt a thump... thump... between my breast bone and navel. "Gas," I said immediately. Mr. Husband, funny man, responded, "You're not pregnant are you?"

In an instant I went from, I can't hold my eyes open, I'm so sleepy, already in the bed at 8:30, to all the way left!

After carrying and birthing five children, I know a thing or two... five, about baby movements, and kicking. And my mind went there. Needless to say, I was NO LONGER sleepy!

I felt that thump, thump again. My eyes got HUGE. Putting both hands on my stomach, while laying flat on my back, I felt something. Something like a... a... baby!

I was ready to get out of bed, and run to Wal-Mart. I told Mr. Husband, put your hand here. Feel it. I was talking to my dog-gone self. He had fallen to sleep, and left me awake talking to myself. I was in full panic attack mode! No, I'm not a drama Mama! The longer I laid there, the more I felt little flutters. I was just about convinced.

I'm not knocking women who decide to have children later. But for Mr. Husband and I, we're enjoying our children being older. They are mostly self sufficient, and able to take care of each other. When we all want to leave the house, I don't have to make a bottle, or pack a diaper bag. The best part, we NO LONGER PAY DAYCARE! (Hallelujah Chorus).

I loved when my children were young, and I wouldn't change it for the world. Honestly, having babies is hard work, rewarding, but hard work. We had a baby, or babies, and paid daycare from 1989 to 2004 (when my youngest went to kindergarten). That's 15 years!

Two years ago, I had a procedure that left me unable to bear children, but did not make me sterile. That means there's always a possibility.

The next morning after my psychotic episode, I ended up in the ER after a car accident. Before x-rays, I asked the nurse for a pregnancy test. It only confirmed my mind was indeed playing tricks on me!

Like I said, "Gas."

Top Ten: Mama I Can't Find...

In my 20 years of being a mother, I've heard Mama, I can't find this, or that more times than I can remember. Following are my top ten.

Mama, I can't find. . .

1. The answer to that question. It's not in THIS book.

2. My shoes. No, I didn't look under the bed, because I put them in the closet.

3. My glasses. They were on my face when I went to bed.

4. My socks. She put them on. Make her take off her shoes, and let me see.

5. That street. Yes, I followed your directions. Oh... I was supposed to turn there.

6. My jacket with the hood. I didn't leave it at school. It came home with me. I think!

7. My cell phone. Call my number, so I can listen for it.

8. That screw driver. You said look in what drawer again? What's a phillips head?

9. Your box. I'm in the closet, and I'm looking down, yes my hand is out. But there is no... Oh, that blue box.

10. My wallet. I don't remember the last time I saw it. Yes, I had money in it, $50.